Put up or shut up
I had only been in Ohio for a few weeks when I attended my first hash. That night I met my
awful ex-boyfriend, M, and her soon to be boyfriend. For a few months the four of us spent a good amount of time together; going on trips, eating out, and drinking heavily (as most hashers do). Within six months I had gained fifteen pounds, I was at my heaviest weight ever and I looked atrocious. I made changes, I took the means necessary to lose the weight, and within months it was off again. And I was single again.
As for M, it wasn’t the same. She and her boyfriend have been together for over a year and a half. Within that time she has gained over fifty pounds. More than fifty pounds. That isn’t a small amount and it is impossible for her to hide. She has removed herself from our hash group and I rarely see her these days. At the beginning of the year, M was proud to mention that she had joined the local gym. Fantastic, I thought, now she can get back to her old self.
That was more than five months ago. How frequently has she attended the gym? Three times. The first time I was supposed to join her, but she was wishy-washy the night before so I didn’t set an alarm. She was furious that I didn’t show, but somehow she went to a body pump class. Next she met with a personal trainer (since it was offered free with membership) who was kind enough to tell her that she should only repeat a workout three times before changing it up and that workout classes were useless. She listened to the trainer. She returned to do the workout the trainer planned, but stopped right after.
I know it isn’t my place, but her actions frustrate the hell out of me. She has taken the first step to better herself, but has been stuck in a stand still since. No matter how much her friends (myself included) have offered to exercise with her, she refuses to do anything. Her boyfriend (a good friend of mine) joined the gym to help motivate her. Now he goes three times a week. Did this help? Nope.
She joined us for Girl’s Night last week and it is apparent that she is continuing to gain weight. It isn’t pretty. And I don’t know what to do. I have no right to get upset with her, but I want to help her. She refuses to workout with me (probably because I’m slightly too high energy about exercising), she won’t workout with her boyfriend, and no one else can push her out of her rut. I hate seeing my friends spiral out of control. What is a girl to do?
Have you ever dealt with a frustrating friend? What has helped motivate them to alter their harmful lifestyle?